But, Dad
by RGoodfellow64
Summary: Alexis is surprised by Kate and they finally discuss their feelings.
1. Chapter 1

But, Dad…

by RGoodfellow64

.

.

Disclaimer: I don't own Richard Castle, Alexis Castle or Katherine Beckett…I just borrow them from time to time.

.

.

.

"But, Dad…she hurt you. She hurt you badly, and I would even go so far as to say she broke your heart."

He sat on her dorm bed, boxes all around her and tried to think of the words he wanted to say, that he needed to say so she would understand. Kate Beckett _did_ break his heart, more than once to be honest, but she was the only person who could mend it as well.

Which she did.

"Sweetie…" he paused as he looked into her eyes and then sighed. "I wish you were little and I could tell you that she made me all better, but you're not. You deserve an explanation and you deserve to know that right now, I am in a very good place."

Alexis shook her head and looked out the window behind her father. This was Columbia, she was starting college and had moved out of her home. There were so many changes going on in her life and she wasn't sure his telling her he was in a good place was enough. Not when they were talking about Detective Beckett. She needed to make sure he wouldn't be hurt again and truthfully, she didn't fully trust the detective not to do that. She'd seen how much Beckett hurt her father before. She held back a shudder as scenes from the summer after her shooting came to mind.

"How can you be sure though Dad, you've been in a 'good place' before with her and every single time she's let you down." Alexis put her hand out and placed it on his forearm, "Dad, I don't want to see you hurt again, and I'm sorry if this isn't what you want to hear, but I don't trust her to protect you."

"Alexis, I have the vest, but she and…"

"I'm not talking _physically_ Dad, I'm talking emotionally. Mentally. I'm talking about your heart. Ever since you and Grams were held at the bank, I've known she'll do what she can to protect you. She may even mean what she says to you now, about caring for you."

She paused a moment to collect her thoughts, then said, "I don't think she can help what she does when she hurts you Dad. I think it's a problem inside of her that makes her push you away, to do something that cuts you deeply."

Rick shook his head no and opened his mouth to speak but Alexis put her hand up to stop him, "Dad, just think about this, ok? Think about what it was like after her apartment blew up and she stayed with us for a while. Suddenly you were writing a new character named 'Schlemming' and we both know why that was. After all that you did for her she decided that some other detective was better than you were. That this guy cared more for her than you did."

She stopped for a moment to watch his eyes as he remembered that time and added, "Dad, you may want to forget that time, but I remember it vividly because you ran back to Gina, and we both know how that worked out."

Rick sighed and said, "Pumpkin, that was a long time ago…" as Alexis was about to interrupt he put up his hand and said, "Let me finish sweetie." At her nod he continued, "That was a long time ago, not in years, but emotionally. Emotionally for both of us. Kate and I have discussed it and I found out things I never realized at the time. It was a time of missed opportunity and miscommunication. It was also a time when we still hid our emotions and feeling from each other, when we tried to protect ourselves and not open ourselves up to hurt. Unfortunately that's exactly what it did do…hurt us both."

"That's what I mean Dad, it happened before, what's to stop it from happening again?"

"Nothing can totally stop it, Alexis," Rick replied. "All we can do is work at it; work at keeping each other aware of our feelings, our needs, and our fears. All we can do is keep talking to each other and working as hard as we can to make us work. Because Alexis, there is definitely as 'us' now."

Alexis thought how to convince her father to be more careful with Beckett. True she was a beautiful woman, and Alexis knew her father was no slouch when it came to going after what he wanted. Yet from almost the very beginning, there was something different about his relationship with the detective. At first Alexis thought it was a good thing because her father was grounded, acting, well sometimes acting more adult than she was used to seeing. She saw her dad more than the person that Gina and Paula created.

However, it was also true that the more her father felt for Beckett, the more she seemed to hold him at arms length. After all, she stayed with that doctor…

Alexis looked in her fathers eyes and said, "Dad, I'm afraid that although you believe that you and she are a couple, in your words an 'us', I worry if she feels the same. Remember that you wear your heart on your sleeve and you've been hurt before, not only by her."

Rick started to shake his head, "Alexis…" but she interrupted him and said, "Dad, I know what happened with Mom."

He blanched the moment he heard those words. He had done everything in his power to keep Alexis from knowing what Meredith did. He never wanted his little girl to know that she was never truly wanted by her mother. That she was never really loved by her mother. Meredith was an actress and never loved anyone other than herself. "How…"

"Dad, it's out there on the internet if you search for it. I needed to know why it was just us for all those years. I know what Mom did to you, and I understand why you thought Gina would be good for us, even though it turned out not to be. I know that when you open your heart you tend not to look to see if there is any water in the pool. You just step straight out and dive in blindly. This is why you've been hurt before and no one, as far as I can tell, as ever hurt you as much as Detective Beckett."

Rick could only nod his head in agreement, because he never cared so deeply for any other woman before in his life as he does for Kate. He knew that she could easily tear him to pieces with the hold she has over him, but that's a two way street, because she gave him the same ammunition to either use or cherish. No matter what circumstances may bring, Rick knew that whatever she gave him, he would cherish. Just as he cherishes the young woman sitting next to him, whom he sometimes still sees as a little girl.

Alexis saw the look appear in his eyes, the look that was always only for her. She knew he was now thinking about her and hoped it would make him realize that no matter how much he felt for the detective, it would never be enough. Detective Beckett wasn't the high maintenance that Gina was, she was far and away much, much more. Beckett would take everything he gave her and need more. Alexis had to make him understand that no matter how much he cared, she would never care half as much for him.

"Dad, why did she stay with that doctor for so long? The jerk attacked you in the hospital and blamed you for what she caused."

Rick tried to answer but Alexis didn't let him, "Dad, she blamed you for Captain Montgomery's death, and was even blaming you for her being shot and in the hospital!"

"Alexis…"

"No Dad, don't you see? If you were to blame for Captain Montgomery being killed, then you are to blame that she was at the cemetery, and you are to blame for her being shot! Dad, her boyfriend would never have blamed you if she hadn't led him to believe it!" Alexis realized she was almost yelling at her father and stopped, surprised at her own outburst.

If Alexis was shocked, it was nothing compared to Rick, who never really understood why his daughter changed her mind about Kate, but now he began to and he was surprised at the hurt and anger she'd held inside.

"Dad," Alexis said in a softer tone of voice, "If she didn't blame you for all of that, if she didn't hold it against you that she was shot, why did she send you away and never contact you for almost four months?" Alexis shook her head and added, "No one who loves you would ever do something that hurtful. No one who cares would ever go so far out of their way to inflict that much pain. Dad, I'm sorry but I don't believe she has the capacity to love. Not anymore anyway. I understand she's hurt because of her mother and I can only imagine how it must have changed her, but that doesn't mean she has to keep inflicting pain on other people."

She paused a moment and said, "Dad, I just want you to be careful here. She has a history of hurting you, of going out of her way to do that, and I'm afraid she's only setting you up for more pain."

Rick was shocked into silence. How could he make Alexis understand that what she was thinking was not Kate? How could he make her understand that Kate wasn't trying to inflict pain but trying to protect him…to protect him from herself.

"Sweetie, Kate and I have made a lot of mistakes over the years, but one thing that did happen is that we learned about each other. I kidded her once about being my work wife, and if you think about it, that's really how our relationship was for so many years."

Alexis didn't speak, but her eyes spoke volumes. Rick continued, "What Kate and I had these past four years was a growing, a learning, a beginning of understanding if you will. Sweetie, those first two years I was pretty much a pain in the ass for her. Although I became more and more of a partner, I was always considered the tag-along pain. But during the second year working together something started to change and Kate as well as the rest of the team, began to accept me, accept my ideas, and look at me as more than a simple tag-along, I had become a member of the team. By the time her apartment blew up, we were becoming closer as friends. I knew things about her that even Lanie, who you could say is her best friend, didn't know."

He reached out and took Alexis' hand in his and said, "I messed up badly back then. Everyone was thinking I was no more than just a two dimensional playboy and then when Bobby Mann was murdered what did I do? I went right back to being a jerk. I lived down to my reputation Alexis, and it hurt my chance with Kate. She didn't think I could be trusted and honestly, I proved her correct. That was why she went out with Demming."

"Dad…"

"Alexis, I know this is more information that you want to hear, but you need to realize that your father has feet of clay, and like any other human, he can make a mistake. I've made plenty in my time, and the only part of my life I can look at with pride is you, and my writing."

Alexis looked down and felt tears form in her eyes. "Oh Dad," she said, but he stopped her by squeezing her hand and said, "It was because of me that she looked at him, and then we simply didn't talk to each other, but misread what the other was saying. Thinking I had no chance with Kate I foolishly became involved with Gina, not knowing that Kate had broken things with Demming to be with me…to give us a chance."

Alexis looked up and her eyes were wide with surprise. "She what?"

"She was going to give us a chance and go to the Hamptons but Gina came up to get me and I turned away and left. I never called her because I felt she and Demming should be allowed to their own privacy, not knowing that they were no longer together. I also didn't call anyone else because, stupidly I didn't want to hear how happy she was with me gone."

Alexis squeezed his hand and he took a deep breath before he continued, "You know what happened when I came back. What you don't know is that even though Kate was dating Josh, she actually spent more time with me than she did with him. Our relationship picked up again from where we'd left it and our friendship actually became stronger. Sweetie, when she was shot she didn't hide away to hurt me, she hid away in a mistaken attempt to keep from hurting me."

"Dad, that doesn't make any sense."

"When she was lying there in the grass, I told her I loved her. She held on to that Alexis, but she knew she had too much baggage to have a stable relationship with me. She had to heal both physically and emotionally because she loved me too."

Alexis shook her head in denial, "Dad…"

"Sweetie, she spent most of this past year seeing a therapist so she could get past the walls she put up when her mother died. She has worked hard to better herself, Alexis. To better herself so that when we got together, because that was always her goal, that we would have a good chance at making it work. An honest chance."

Alexis looked at him, with an intensity to her gaze that told him she was seriously considering what he'd just said.

"We've only been together a few weeks now Alexis, but we have gone so much farther in this, and much sooner, than we ever thought. We already know almost all that we need to about each other."

Alexis frowned and the crease between her eyes told him she didn't quite understand what he meant.

"I have never been this honest before with any woman, Alexis. Kate has never been as honest with any man. We are communicating in a way that we never have before, with anyone, including each other. We are both being honest with our fears, our desires and our needs. This is beyond anything I have ever felt sweetie, much stronger already than any relationship I've ever had."

He shook his head and gave a soft smile when he said, "I always knew that together we'd be amazing, but Alexis, this is so much more than I ever thought possible."

Alexis sighed. What she heard was different from what she'd known of their strange pairing. Some of what he said answered questions she'd held, but there was still that kernel of doubt, that mistrust that the detective wouldn't revert, or even worse, was just playing with his heart.

However, it really came down to only one thing and that was her dad. She could no more live his life for him than he could live hers. Ultimately, it was his decision and whatever that was she would have to live with, but that didn't mean she would turn a blind eye. She loved her father so much, and had been so angry with the detective for so long, that it was hard to change; and really, she wasn't sure if she wanted to.

"Dad, I can't say I'm thrilled by this news, and I won't lie to you and pretend to be happy about it. She's cut you too deeply for me to simply forgive and forget. If she hurt me, I would be able to forgive, but she hurt you, she cut you deeply, and I cannot find it in myself to just smile and pretend it didn't happen."

She squeezed his hand as she noticed the sorrow in his eyes, "That doesn't mean I won't support you though. It just means…" she paused as she tried to find the right words to convey her thoughts. "It means that I will give her the benefit of the doubt, but for you, not for her. I hope that she proves me wrong, that she truly does love you and wants to be with you for the rest of your lives, I really do. I want you to be happy Dad, and I can see that right now, you are. Even with my leaving, you have a lightness about you that you haven't had in a long time, and I guess I can attribute that to her."

Rick smiled and pulled her to him, giving her a hug as he said, "Thank you pumpkin, that's all I ask, that you give us a chance."

Alexis hugged her father back. There was never any question in her mind about him. She knows how much he loves her and how much she loves him. This is her dad, her hero; the one person she knows will always be there for her. Always. No, it's Detective Beckett she questions. It's Detective Beckett she doesn't fully trust any more, and with good reason.

As they slowly pulled apart Alexis smiled at the happiness in her dad's face. She hoped she wouldn't see it replaced with sadness, or hurt because of the detective. As she smiled back, she knew that the only way she could ever fully accept Detective Kate Beckett would be after she spent a lifetime with her father. If Kate Beckett is still with her dad, still making him happy up to the day he dies, then, and only then will Alexis feel she truly does love her dad.

In the meantime, she would keep her eyes open to ensure that if Beckett ever hurts her dad again, she will be there to help him put the pieces back together. Giving him another hug, she hoped that will never happen.

.

.

.

**Authors Note: Just something that I felt drawn to write. Hmmm, drawn to write? Anyway Alexis doesn't know all that her dad and Kate have gone through, but she does know how much Kate hurt her dad, and she proved in Rise that no one, even jackass cardio surgeons, hurts her father. This actually takes place somewhere in the middle of their conversation, after Castle has told her that he and Beckett are now together.**


	2. Chapter 2

But, Dad…

by RGoodfellow64

Chapter 2

.

.

Disclaimer: I thought I covered it all in chapter 1; don't own 'em, check; just borrow them, check. Yeah, I thought so.

.

.

**Mini Authors Note: For Bella, Shutterbug, mason13, doikea and Mark C., because you asked. **

.

.

She walked the familiar hallway with multiple feelings. Happy that she was here, a bit nervous at what she planned to do, and feeling almost as if she didn't belong…no, not that she didn't belong, but perhaps that she'd started to look at it differently. It wasn't really home and yet it was. She hadn't been here for the past three weeks and in a spur of the moment, seize the day action, she decided to come here for the weekend.

Totally not her. Nothing planned, just spontaneous. Impulsive. Something that she decided was a very Castle thing to do.

When she arrived at the door, she suddenly found the key in her hand did not fit the lock. Looking down it wasn't that the key didn't fit, but her hand was slightly shaking and she stopped to stare at it. Why would her hand shake? How many times had she done this before? She willed her hand to put the key in the lock and turn it. With the door unlocked, she turned the knob, opened the door and quickly pushed herself in.

With a smile on her face, she looked out into the empty living room, but she heard movement in the kitchen and the aroma coming from there was absolutely mouth watering. She started to walk there and yelled, "Hi Dad, I'm home, smells so good?"

Turning the corner and entering the kitchen, she froze at the sight before her. It wasn't her dad who was standing there, mouth open in surprise; it wasn't her father who was cooking. Without realizing it, her smile disappeared and she blurted out, "Detective Beckett? What are you doing here?"

"Alexis! Hi!" Kate said, still surprised at the young woman's arrival. I'm…uh…it's my grandmother's recipe for turkey croquets."

Alexis nodded her head and said, "They do smell amazing." Then looking around asked, "Where's my dad?"

Kate smiled and said, "It seems that the world would come to an end if there wasn't any whipped cream to go along with the cherry pie."

Although feeling a bit put off finding the detective here without her father, Alexis had to smile at Kate. Her dad didn't just love whipped cream, he practically idolized it. Suddenly her eyes opened as she realized what Kate said, "Cherry pie?"

Seeing the smile on Alexis' face, Kate felt calmer and replied, "Yeah, I made it at home last night."

"Good thing, if it was here Dad would probably have eaten more than half of it before tonight." She paused a moment and asked, "So…you weren't here last night?"

Kate saw an opening and knew that if she was ever going to get the chance to talk to Alexis, now was the time. Rick would still be gone for another thirty minutes at least. She took a quick look at the timer on the stove then turned back to Alexis and said, "Alexis, I feel I need to tell you some things, and I honestly think you deserve to hear them."

Alexis stared into Beckett's eyes, slowly nodded her head and sat down on one of the stools by the counter.

Kate couldn't help but notice that Alexis had a very good poker face, she couldn't see any emotion emanating from it at all, but she did see a brief flicker of…something, in her eyes just before she sat down.

The counter now between them, Kate looked Alexis in the eyes and said, "I am in love with your father, and have been for a long time now."

With her face still emotionless Alexis asked, "How long?"

"I realized how much he meant to me that summer you went to Princeton, but I really knew I loved him last year."

"Last year? As in before you were shot?"

Kate slowly nodded her head and said, "Yes."

"Pretty strange way of showing it, Detective."

Kate heard the underlying anger in Alexis' voice, despite the fact that her face still showed no emotion. Suddenly that changed and her eyes flashed, "Weren't you still dating that worthless excuse of a doctor then?"

"Josh?"

Alexis dismissively waved her hand, "Yeah, him. Wasn't he your _boyfriend_ when you realized you were in love with my dad?"

Kate was surprised at the anger in Alexis' voice. Taken by surprise she could only nod her head, but at the look Alexis gave her added, "He was an excuse."

Alexis had been leaning towards Kate but pulled back and said, "An excuse?"

Kate nodded her head again and said, "At first he was a rebound, your dad had come back from the Hamptons with Gina and I realized that I'd lost any chance I had with him, so when I met Josh…" she shrugged her shoulders and said, "I thought if your dad had moved on, then I should too."

Alexis had a confused look on her face and said, "What do you mean 'moved on'? You weren't in love with him then, were you?"

Kate sighed and said, "I might have been."

Alexis looked at Kate and the anger was still present when she said, "You might have been? What kind of an answer is that? Either you were or you weren't."

Kate looked down at the counter and said, "Alexis, it's…no, it _was_ complicated."

"Well un-complicate it for me."

The tone in her voice made Kate look up and ask, "Do you hate me that much Alexis?"

Now it was Alexis who was taken aback. "No! No, I don't hate you Detective. I…" she paused as she tried to find the right words to say. "I guess I'm just angry at the way you treated my dad."

As Kate looked at her, Alexis said, "I'm not just angry, I'm hurt and I feel that you took advantage of him all this time." She stopped speaking, looked Kate in the eyes and said, "I dread the day that you run away again and hurt him beyond my being able to help him heal."

Kate was shocked. "Alexis, what makes you think I'll run away? I love him!"

"You said you loved him last year, didn't you?" At Kate's nod, she continued, "And you say your feelings were complicated even before that, right?"

Kate nodded again and Alexis said, "Well weren't you running from him when you stayed with your _boyfriend_ while you supposedly were in love with my dad?"

Kate could hear the disdain in Alexis' voice when she said the word 'boyfriend', and was about to ask her why when she continued, "And you certainly ran away after you were shot. I heard him tell Grams that he told you he loved you while you were lying there. He told you he loved you and you ran away for four months, after lying to him that you would call."

Kate stood in place, stunned by the vehemence in the young woman's voice. Alexis leaned forward and Kate found herself wanting to take a step back, it was so intimidating. "He told you he loved you and you never said a word. He told you he loved you and you ran away and hid from him. He told you he loved you and you never even let him know you were still alive!"

Kate couldn't speak. She was too much in shock at what was happening. Never in her wildest imagination did she ever think that Alexis was harboring such thoughts and feelings, and she never expected this polite young woman to be as ferocious as she was now. Kate just stood and took what Alexis dished out.

"He wore himself out trying to find out who shot you. He hardly slept, hardly ate, and he spent all his time working for you. Waiting for you. Living each day for you and you never acknowledged it. You never thanked him. You never did anything for him, but you continued to take. Take and take and take till he had nothing left to give, and then, then you finally decided to show up and expected he'd just forget about it all and go back to the way things used to be."

If this wasn't hate, it was close enough. Kate simply stood and listened while Alexis continued to mention all the times that her father was there for her, all the things he did for her and how much he cared for her. She thought the tirade was over when Alexis said, "And then suddenly he came home one day and started drinking. When I asked him why he was home so early he said he needed a break. Dr. Parish had sent me home after working all night after that explosion, and looking at my dad I knew something terrible had happened…and I knew it had to do with you."

Alexis took a breath and said, "The next day he was gone, out of the blue he decided to go to Las Vegas. Dr. Parish told me he pulled up to a crime scene with some blonde bimbo and let her drive off with his car."

"Jacinda," Kate said, softly.

"Jacinda?" Alexis asked.

Kate shook her head, "Yeah, that was…that was a hard time for us."

"A hard time huh? Well I guess it was because he started to talk to Grams about ending his time at the precinct, and that Frozen Heat would be his last Nikki Heat book."

"He did?"

"Yes, he seemed to be falling apart and still trying to keep it together right up to my graduation, and then suddenly he's happy, and back working with you and then I find that the two of you are together and honestly Detective, can you really wonder why I'm waiting for the other shoe to drop?"

Kate took a moment to compose herself. No one had ever spoken to her like that before and for the first time she saw the past four years from eyes other than her own. It wasn't something she liked to see, but she also knew it wasn't the whole story.

Alexis waited, watching Detective Beckett and waiting for her to respond. She felt…she wasn't sure what she felt actually. Part of her was happy that she had said what she did, but part of her was aghast at the fact she did it. This really wasn't her. Alexis Castle didn't say things like this to other people, especially her father's girlfriends.

"You know what I first thought when I met your father, Alexis?" As the girl shook her head no, Kate said, "I thought he was a jackass. A stuck up, pompous, playboy who thought he was God's gift to women. That is the Richard Castle I met at the Storm Fall party four years ago."

Kate paused and before Alexis could respond she said, "You've worked with Lanie and Perlmutter, you know how much we care about the victims and want to find closure for their families, right?"

When Alexis nodded her head Kate said, "All your father wanted was copies of the photo's; photo's of the victims killed like the victims in his books, just so he could brag to his poker playing author friends."

Alexis was surprised to hear this. She knew her dad could act childish, but to be so uncaring? That wasn't him at all.

"I was really, really disappointed Alexis. After my mom was murdered I was in a dark place, it was your fathers' books that helped me back then. I was looking for a book, anything to dull the pain and grabbed 'In a Hail of Bullets'. Once I started reading, I couldn't put it down. Everything I needed to take my mind away was there, but so much better than anything else I'd read. What I got most out of Rick's books was hope. Hope that there can be closure, hope that there could be an answer, hope that, although the dead can never come back, that the living can go on. Can live. Can have a life worth living, because at that time, mine wasn't."

This was something Alexis never knew about Ka…Detective Beckett. The pain that she must have been living with was something she'd never experienced, and hoped she never would. She slowly nodded her head in response and waited, knowing there was more to be said.

Kate looked into Alexis' eyes and said, "The man who asked for the photos couldn't possibly be the same man who wrote those wonderful words. After I finished 'In a Hail of Bullets' I went out to buy every Richard Castle book I could find. While I was starting to heal from those books, my father fell into alcoholism and I found myself having to take care of him and not able to grieve as I needed to. Once again it was Rick's books that helped me through this time and as my dad went into rehab, I finished school here in New York and entered the police academy."

Kate paused and said, "Alexis, my mother was taken from me, my father abandoned me for the bottle and I hid behind my badge. Then I thought that perhaps a man I'd met would understand, could be there for me. We dated for six months and I really thought I had found the right guy when he left for a better job in Boston."

"He just up and left?" Alexis quietly asked.

"Oh he said we would talk about it, but all the talk turned out to be either I pack my bags and follow him wherever he is or we break up. He never entertained the thought of staying for me, or of my being as important in his life as his career."

Alexis just stared and wondered how deeply Kate had been hurt. She didn't even think of her as a detective any more, she was a woman who had been burned. Then she thought of how much her father hurt and asked, "So since that guy hurt you, you decided to hurt others?"

Kate looked into Alexis' eyes and Alexis was shocked to see the pain there. "No Alexis. It just showed me that if you care for someone, they will leave you."

Alexis couldn't comprehend that Kate Beckett would say something like that. "What…?"

Kate sighed and said, "My mom left me. My dad left me for the bottle, and then Will left me for Boston. In between my becoming a cop and meeting Will, my training officer quit the force and left. It has taken a lot of therapy, which I'm still taking by the way, to realize that my thoughts of relationships was warped. Caring for someone, letting them in and jumping into life with them meant that they were going to leave me. So every relationship I had before this one was doomed from the start. Not only would I not commit to anything, I always kept one foot out the door ready to bolt before the guy did."

Alexis looked at Kate and just could not comprehend that this woman, this beautiful and vibrant woman, was so deeply wounded. That she was so hurt by her past that it kept her from even believing a future was possible.

"Alexis, I've been seeing a therapist for over a year now. After I came back from being shot, knowing that your dad loved me, I knew that any chance we had was doomed to fail if I didn't go into it with everything I have. Rick deserves no less than all of me Alexis, and all of me was pretty messed up when I came back."

"You seemed ok to me when you got Dad and Gram out of that bank," Alexis softly said.

"I wasn't," Kate replied. She paused and added, "I've always been able to put up a really good front, but even then I was still denying that I had some serious issues to overcome."

"And have you? Overcome them I mean?"

"Some of them. Most of them? I do know that the biggest fear I had, allowing myself to love someone fully…" Kate paused for a moment and grinned, "Yeah, that one is definitely gone."

Something inside Alexis felt very, very happy to hear Kate say those words. She found herself surprised that she was thinking of her as Kate again, rather than 'Detective Beckett' or 'the Detective.'

But she was still worried. She still worried that something would happen to make Kate run away again. Hide herself away from everyone and she needed to know that wasn't going to happen again; so she looked Kate in the eyes and asked, "Are you sure?"

Kate smiled and Alexis was surprised at how joyful it looked. She'd never seen a smile like that on Kate's face before. "Alexis I have never felt this way for anyone before in my life. I have never felt so secure with a person, let alone a man, as I do with your father. I have never felt so powerful and yet so helpless as I do now."

Kate paused a moment, trying to convey with her eyes just how much Rick meant to her. "Alexis, I don't think I could survive not being with your father. My feelings for him are so strong, so deep, so powerful that I was afraid to give in to them. I was afraid to give up control of my life, of my emotions. I knew that with your dad, I was standing on a precipice and the fall would be something I would never survive, and I was right."

Alexis had been smiling but was now confused. "What?" she asked. "You were right?"

The smile was full blown on Kate's face now, her eyes shining with more than moisture as she said, "The Kate Beckett who existed before I jumped in with both feet is gone Alexis. She didn't survive the fall." She pointed to her heart and added, "But _this_ Kate Beckett, she was caught by the man she loves. _She_ is standing here with you now, not the Kate Beckett you met four years ago, or even the Kate Beckett from last year."

One of the benefits of a private education was the choice of courses open to students. Alexis had taken full advantage of that and in her senior year her psychology course spent much of the year concentrating on__body and facial language reading skills. Growing up with Richard Castle as a father, Alexis had to learn early how to tell if people were genuine or not, and last year her course improved on what she already knew to the point that she easily aced the course.

Right now, she saw nothing in Kate's posture or face that showed anything other than her genuine love for her father. Having observed 'Uncle Bobby' in action, both in private and in his public personae as Mayor, Alexis knew when people were putting on an act. There was no acting going on with Kate. Alexis knew, she absolutely knew beyond the shadow of a doubt, that right at this moment Kate Beckett was in love with her father.

She needed to know more. She needed to know… "Dad says this is 'forever' Kate. Is that was you think?"

Kate's eyes grew wide and the full blown smile changed to a shy, hesitant one. "Did he really say that, Alexis?" she asked.

Alexis shrugged and said with a slight smile, "He and Grams don't realize how far their voices carry." Her smile widened and she added, "And from all those years of laser tag I've gotten pretty light on my feet too."

She stopped smiling, looked at Kate and with all seriousness in her voice asked, "What do you think your relationship with my dad is Kate?"

Alexis observed Kate with all the learning she had, with every one of her senses alert and couldn't help but feel relief when Kate softly answered, "That's really good to know Alexis, because when I look at Rick I see the rest of my life."

Kate paused, opened her arms and said, "I don't know what else to say Alexis, I love your father with every part of me."

At that moment, the buzzer went off on the oven, letting them both know the croquets were done, or close to it. Kate turned her head to the stove then looked again at Alexis, a question on her face. Alexis answered with a smile and said, "They smell delicious Kate, I can't wait to try one."

Kate smiled back and turned to the oven. Grabbing a bright green oven mitt that Rick had in a drawer, Kate opened the oven as Alexis said, "I'm just going to put my bag in my room. I'll be back in a sec."

Kate smiled and said, "Ok," as she pulled out the tray to see the croquets looking just like she remembered from both her mother's and her grandmother's kitchens. It gave her a sense of pride to know she was continuing a family tradition, and that she was doing it with the man and young woman she wanted in hers. She suddenly found she desperately wanted them in her family.

As she closed the oven door and turned off the heat, Kate heard Alexis come down the stairs just as the door opened and she heard Rick. "Can you believe they only had one can of whipped cream? I had to travel six blocks to find another store that had it!"

As he spoke Alexis stopped near the bottom step and giggled. He looked up, saw her there and a huge grin came on his face. "Pumpkin!" he exclaimed as he dropped the bag of whipped cream, ran to the stairs and grabbed Alexis in a big hug and swung her around in a circle.

Alexis' face was beaming as he exclaimed, "I've missed you soooo much!" And she had to laugh as he refused to let her go. Kate watched from the kitchen with a big smile on her face, happy for the two of them and loving that she was there to be part of it.

Rick finally put Alexis down and said, "Will you stay for supper? Will you stay the weekend? Are you finished with school and moving back home?"

Alexis laughed and nodded her head, "I came home for the weekend and supper smells delicious!"

"Good," Kate said from the kitchen, "Because everything is ready."

With his arm still around Alexis, Rick walked to the kitchen where they all picked up the plates and filled them before sitting down at the dining room table. As dinner progressed Alexis looked up and said to no one in particular, "I've missed family meals. I'm glad I came home." She then looked at Kate and smiled.

She realized that what her dad and Kate had was going to last. They both would have ups and downs, but any doubts Alexis had were gone. She was looking forward to what the future held in her family…a family that now truly included Kate Beckett.

.

.

**AUTHORS NOTE: We know Alexis is not vindictive, she does have a big heart and I think this went the way the characters would go were it real life, as Christina Applegate suggested it was to Jay Leno… Hope this second chapter pleased. **


End file.
